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Years ago when Cirque Du Soleil first surfaced in the states, I was sitting in the audience in their signature white tent. The lights were low and the funky candlelit procession of performers began winding their way slowly through the audience. It was cool but pretty eerie. Certainly not Barnum and Bailey and like nothing anyone had seen before. Suddenly in the row behind me I heard a little boy whisper “I don’t like this Grandma.” I could hear his grandma murmur something to him. A few seconds later, louder this time, I heard “I don’t like this Grandma!” Again she murmured a few words of encouragement to him. Suddenly he yelled really loud “I JUST DON’T LIKE IT! OKAY?!” Needless to say, Grandma removed him from the tent, never to return to their seats.

What I like about this true story, is that he didn’t care about the cost of the ticket or how it would look to leave in the middle of a performance, he just wanted out, so… he got out! Amazing! Imagine feeling like not doing something and just not doing it?

I think of that kid a lot when I have to do things I don’t like doing. Like running on the treadmill “I just don’t like it OKAY?” And my inner grandma will tell me a million reasons why I should workout. “It’s good for me, I’ll fit in my skinny jeans, we paid good money for this health club membership, etc!” You can’t talk yourself in to liking something because resistance will win every time!

That’s the problem with setting goals and making every step to achieve that goal something you hate to do. You’ve got to remember it’s not just the accomplishment but the journey to that end goal that counts.

You won’t stick with goals that aren’t fun. I don’t care what anyone says. It’s got nothing to do with discipline. Discipline comes out of enjoyment. My husband will say that I’m disciplined about my checkbook. Well, I don’t love balancing my checkbook but I like knowing where my money is going, that I have control over my finances and that I know things are in order, so balancing my checkbook every week or so is easy for me. Same with paying bills. I don’t stress about it, I just do it. When I lived in NYC I dropped 15 pounds without really trying because I loved walking the streets of Manhattan. I would throw on my backpack early on Saturday morning and walk around the neighborhoods until evening. Since I didn’t have a car in the city, I just walked everywhere. You even have to walk the stairs to get in and out of the subway. Throw in a couple extra workouts and cut back on a couple of dinners and there you go!

Try this:

• Write down something you want to change in your life i.e. lose weight, get your finances in order, get over your fear of public speaking. Just pick one. No need to pick more. Let’s not go crazy, you can do that later!
  Now jot down why you haven’t changed. I hate working out, I don’t like feeling hungry, I like going out to eat, I must have a new pair of Manolos monthly, I’d rather be seen in a thong on South Beach before getting up in front of a group to speak, etc. You get the idea.
• Now see if you can find a fun way to accomplish the same goal without it being tedious. I hate walking on the treadmill because of the boredom but now that I’m working from home I need to move! So I found a gym that has affordable personal training and a treadmill room that’s dark and shows movies. I get to see a ton of movies and no one can see me on the treadmill. I also get to workout with someone that pushes me and keeps the workouts fresh. Is that a bicep I see? Now, that’s a win win in my book!
• And finally just show up! Now that you found a fun way to tackle some challenges there will still be times you still don’t want to do it. Here I use the advice of the wonderful Sonia Choquette – just show up! Show up to the gym, show up to the page (if you’re writing), show up to the acting studio, show up for dinner, show up to class, show up to your tub where you meditate. JUST SHOW UP! Don’t think about it, don’t stress about it, just show up!

Try this exercise this week. It should take less than 30 minutes. Be creative, think outside the box. I struggled with debilitating stage fright for most of my adult life but toastmasters only terrified me. Turns out I loved acting and it helped me get over getting up in front of people, painlessly. Figure out a way to make achieving your goal fun and go for it!